Spidey Super Stories #1 (Story 2)

 Posted: 2000


Spider-Man, to our eternal shame and regret, meets the Electric Company, who will become his supporting cast for the rest of the series.

Story 'Spidey Signs Up! (2 pages)'

We start with the Electric Company kids, who are preparing to go on TV with their show when a cable sparks and breaks and bursts into flames three feet from the dumb kids. Oh yeah, I can tell the Electric Company was real big on children's safety. Sylvia, the producer, (also known as Queen-Afro) doesn't want to disappoint the kids, so she goes looking for someone to fix the cable.

We then get the following scene. She spots Spidey, resting upside-down from a building like some freakish man-bat.
Sylvia: Hey, I bet Spider-Man could help.
Spidey: Huh?
Caption: But Spidey, surprised, flees!
Yeah, if a woman with an afro large enough to hold an entire kingdom of sea-monkeys asks for my help, I might flee, too. But Spider-Man should be able to do a little better than that, or he's going to have to leave town in terror whenever Captain Barracuda is in the neighborhood.
Spidey shoots a webline and crawls to the roof.
Sylvia: If he can climb this thing, so can I!

Yeah, except for the part where he has Spider-Powers and you don't. And how he doesn't stick to his webline and you do. Regardless, she somehow climbs the webline. I know she's an empowered 70s woman and all, and while that may exempt her from some tedious housework, it does not exempt her from the laws of physics. Whatever, she gets up to the roof. She explains her problem to Spidey.
Sylvia: Please help fix the cable... or our fans will be watching the test pattern!
Spidey: Then let's scoot!

(Yeah, let's boogie back to your foxhole, Sylvi-o. Diggin it? Man, I love this 70s dialouge.) Anyway, Spidey arrives back at the the studio and fixes the electrical cable by putting a big line of webbing in the gap and then holding it shut with his hands. How exactly that works, I don't know, because if his webbing is a conductor, Spidey probably would have been dead in Amazing Spider-Man 9, the first time he met Electro. (Gee, I think I'll shoot webbing at his eyes-OH MY GOD, my arm is charring off! AHH!!). Plus, I just don't think holding the sparking cable together with your hands is such a good idea either. Maybe that's just me.

The Electric company then invites Spidey to join their cast.
Spidey's response:*shrug*
My response would be:Get the heck away from me, asylum escapees! Yeah, like I want to be associated with a bunch of mental pygmies like you.
But Spidey agrees and an eight-year horror is born.

General Comments

I find it kind of disturbing that we are introduced to the supporting cast for the series, and we don't even learn their names. Yup, not even worth telling us. And why Sylvia doesn't look for an electrician instead of a man with Spider-powers is beyond me, like much of the logic in this book.

Overall Rating

Two webs. No lame villains, no regular Spidey villains, and the introduction of the least appealing supporting cast since Snapper Carr or the Wonder Twins. They're annoying as sin, but they DO have some of the dumbest lines ever in future stories, and provide mucho entertainment in that regard. So an extra web for that.

 Posted: 2000