Spider-Man Heroes & Villains Collection (UK) #6

Background

This is a 60-part weekly series being pumped into the market by Eaglemoss publications. They don't know much about Spidey, but they know that 60 * $8.99 = quite a lot. And I'm the kind of idiot who will spend that sort of money without doing the math.

There's an original 7-page story in every issue, and collectible trading cards too. Sure, the stories are terrible, the art is ghastly, and the price is far, far too high. But there's glossy paper, trading cards, and an original Spider-Man comic strip series that 99% of the U.S. collectors will never own!

Story 'Venom Rage!'

Peter Parker is living in the luxurious "Osborn Tower", courtesy of his pal Harry. He's relaxing for the "first time in ages" when... hey, what a surprise, he gets interrupted!

Yep, Venom comes a-calling, and he's mad about something. But not Spidey. Still, that doesn't stop Peter from dipping into his secret Spidey-space (yeah, that's a smart move - build a Secret Spidey Space when your landlord is the Green Goblin) and making "the change".

Now, remember that S.H.I.E.L.D. is also occupying half the building too. And that's the half that Venom is on a mission to smash into. Supposedly (according to the boys in blue) it's all toxic from some Goblin experiment, but as Venom and Spidey both discover when Venom drags their running battle into the toxic area that in fact its not toxic at all.

Instead, it's home to a cross-dimensional portal, which incidentally happens to be generating a super-sonic frequency which is driving Venom (and presumably all the neighborhood dogs as well) completely mad. So mad that Venom throws himself through the portal, causing himself to be trans-located to goodness knows where, and the portal to shut itself down.

Colonel Nick Fury is there of course. The guy really is "hands on" in his approach to management. He reckons that Spidey knows something about what's up with the Green Goblin and his trans-universal gateway. Of course he does. But hey, Spidey ain't the type to embarrass his friend Harry just because the mere fate of the universe might depend on it.

General Comments

So, since when was Norman the kind of guy to create cross-dimensional portals. And since when did Spidey put Harry's inconvenience over the risk having aliens invade earth, or the planet being sucked into another dimension, or whatever might happen as a result of him not helping S.H.I.E.L.D. figure out what is going on.

And how come S.H.I.E.L.D. is so damn thick that they can't put two and two together and figure "something odd is happening in the science base of super scientist Norman Osborn, who was recently caught up in the battle where Spider-Man faced six super-villains." Clearly, that's still no reason to suspect super scientist Norman Osborn of being involved or anything, right?

What a bunch of maroons!

Overall Rating

It's all some ghastly parody of what a real Spidey story might look like. Still one web.

Footnote

Artist Ant Williams moves from backup material artist into prime story artist as of this issue. He replaces John Ross, who was a terrible artist. Unfortunately, Ant is just as bad.