Spider-Man Chinese Coloring Book (Colour Filling)

Background

This is a "Colour Filling Book", from China. Notice the spelling of "colour", I'm guessing that whoever assembled this collection of crappy, mostly stolen artwork had a British dictionary, not an American one. Too bad they didn't have access to a British book of Spider-Man artwork to rip off.

Story Details

This is yet another anonymous "Made In China" coloring book. At least, I presume it's made in China. No other country that I'm aware of combines the same cheapness of manufacture with the low quality standards and lack of regard for international copyright law. I'm also assuming this is 2007, since that's the year I first saw it on the shelves at the local "cheap crappy stuff" store.

So, where to begin with describing how putrid this coloring book is? Well, it's 7 1/4" x 10" in size. The paper is gray and looks half-finished. Technically, there are 32 pages, but every second leaf is very thin. Actually, it's thin enough to be tracing paper, except that it would rip if you slid a pencil across the surface. Those very thin leaves are completely blank. But wait, that's not all.

Even the "not so thin" leaves are flimsy, and are printed on only one side. That means that in the final count, three out of four pages are blank, and you get a grand total of eight images to color, and 24 blank pages. But what a remarkable selection of images! Seven of Spider-Man, and one of a cyborg type guy who looks like one of the villains from the Japanese Spidey series from way back.

Words can't do the images justice, I've had to scan in some of the more spectacular pictures. I'm completely staggered by the complete lack of artistry and blissful ignorance of even the very basics of human anatomy. Proportions and features are ludicrously inaccurate. Hands at bizarre angles. Three of the pictures are actually reasonably Spidey art... and all three look kind of familiar poses, I'm pretty sure that the half-decent stuff is stolen. But why not steal the rest of them and at least increase the quality a little?

And why use paper so flimsy that three-quarters of the pages need to be left blank? The cover is decent glossy card... why skimp so much on the content? All I can assume is that (a) Chinese manufacturers are morons, and (b) Chinese children are so desperate that they will accept anything.

General Comments

The paper's not thick or soft enough to make good toilet paper, and the book isn't thick enough to prop up a wobbly table leg. I can only recommend it to bulimic Spider-Fans who are in serious need of a good purging session.

Overall Rating

Ladies and Gentlefans, I think we have found the Worst Spider-Man Coloring Book of All Time! I proudly award it our lowest possible rating, a half web!