Ultimate Spider-Man #67

Background

Logan, the mutant known as Wolverine is a member of the X-Men. His amazing powers include heightened animal senses, a dazzling healing factor and an unbreakable skeleton. Spider-Man (the alter ego of Peter Parker) has had numerous run-ins with this mutant. This time around, they have switched bodies. And last issue ended with Logan turning into street pizza.

Story 'Jump The Shark'

Logan, I mean Peter while inside Logan's body, just got hit big time by a car. He just has a few scratches, nothing fancy. Across the street is the high school of Peter. The kids in his class are looking out the window at the scene on the street. Peter, I mean Logan while inside Peter's body, sneaks out.

On the street, the police apprehend Logan after using a tazer gun on him. Peter witnesses the arrest. Logan tells him to wear the costume and fix this. Later in jail, Logan makes a phone call. He calls the X-Men. They find it hard to believe that he's actually Peter, inside the body of Logan. When Logan accidentally destroys the phone when he pops one of his claws, the police use the tazer gun again.

Meanwhile, Peter puts on his Spider-Man custome. Well, since he's actually Logan, just the mask. He's not going to wear that stupid thing. Using the webshooters to swing across the city isn't a succes. Finally, at the jail, he breaks in to get to the cell where Logan is being held. Peter tells Logan to use the claw to force the lock. Outside, on a roof they try to sort things out as they hear a scream.

Turns out, the Shocker (now wearing a mask) just robbed a bank. Logan and Peter stop him. Then the arguing starts again. But Logan has learned how to use the webshooters and shoots a line at the Shocker, pulling him forward. And of course Peter has learned the strength of Logan's body and hits the Shocker hard enough to floor him. Then the X-Men have arrived.

Jean explains what's going on. She warned Logan that if he would hit on her again, she'd do something mean to him. In this case, a mind whammy. She then fixes the mind swap. Back in his own body, Peter has a painfull shoulder. It's because Logan hurt it while learning how to use the webshooters.

Later, back home, Peter finds Mary Jane sitting on the stairs. He says he's had a crazy day, he wasn't himself. MJ then asks, while holding him, that thing you tried to do this morning, can we not do that till we're older?

General Comments

Logan pizza aka street pizza, that's how the issue started. Or that's what the prevous issue made me believe how it would start. But none of that, no blood, no dislocated limbs, no nothing. Major let down. But I guess we can't have too much gore in a funny book like this.

Then the story. It was funny, but way too long. Certain jokes were old in the previous issue, so I can safely say they were ancient this time around. I think the story was actually an issue and a half long. But cutting was not an option so it was expanded. Mind you, this is pure speculation on my part. But if it's actually true, why not condense the story?

Just take a look at the book, the number of panels on a page is not that high. And then there are several panels without text. Why not use more panels on a page? Why not use shorter dialog? Take a look at the scene where Peter (in Logan's body) makes a call to the X-Men. It takes over two pages. Back in the old days this would have been two panels. I'm not saying we should go back to the 3x3 panel layout, but it would be nice for a change to let things go faster.

Overall Rating

I gave the previous issue 2.5 webs and this was was just as bad. So, need I say more in order to explain why I give this one a 2.5 webs as well? Thought so...